Is life worth living?
I wonder from time to time.
What's the point in being alive, what's the point in working hard if it's all going to disappear one day.
This void that I have inside me, what could ever fill it?
I used to think it was because I missed her.
But it's not right?
I really am useless no?
I can't work hard, and as soon as something inconvenient happens, all this motivation turns to dust.
I can't push through, I don't even want to.
I thought that not trying would be the worst thing.
That was before I gave it my all and failed.
What am I supposed to do if I try my best and fail?
Do I try again?
Or should I just give up and do something else.
I hate how half assed I am.
I hate how I'm never able to just give it my all.
Maybe I am, but my all is just not enough.
Do I have strengths, do I have anything that I'm good at?
I don't know why I feel good about myself sometimes.
Because I'm useless. Utterly and completely useless.
I can't even do something so simple.
I always reach for excuses.
I always blame things other than myself.
When will I be able to just grow?
Can I grow?
I feel so frustrated.
Why can't I do better?
Why can’t I do more
Why do I always feel like giving up?
Why do I feel so melancholy?
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